Is This Thing Working?



The Pretender Looks At 50

With my 50th birthday in the rearview mirror, I seem to be getting a bit nostalgic and as Jean Beauvoir would say "I'm missing the young days"! Sure, I'm lovin' my life with my Little Man, my beautiful wife, my awesome parents and little brother....but who knew it would go by so quickly. Where did the time go?

When I look back I sometimes find it hard to believe that I ever ended up here....graduated, married, my own business, great kid! Take University for example... "I graduated, really?" Not sure how, since I remember spendng most of my time up at York University playing hockey and working out in the gym along side Ben Johnson... much more time than I did being in class. Still, I got my degree! I just don't remember working that hard to actually accomplish! Then there is my beautiful wife...I somehow got lucky there....and married far above my pay grade!! DANIMA is another perfect example. I didn't have a business degree when I started the company....I'm a Phys-Ed major. I had very little business sense...I simply pretended for years...hell, some might say I am still pretending! But it's now been almost 20 years with DANIMA, 12 years with my Little Man and 30 years with my beautiful wifeand The Pretender hasn't least not yet! Not sure how...but as Reg K Dwight once sang "I'm Still Standing".

I have to admit...I was not looking forward to fifty and have a tough time saying I'm FIFTY. The thought of being fifty, just makes me feel can't even "pretend" to be young, like you could in your 40's. You have to own up to it and start being that person you never wanted to be back in your youth - the old guy! Think about it, at fifty the next milestone is 60...and then 70 (God willing)...but those are mighty big numbers!!

Being fifty you just don't look ahead with a big ole smile, anticipating those next milestones. Remember when you were 14 or 15 and you looked ahead and thought..."wow, I can't wait until I'm 16 when I can get my licence and drive"....then off to university, marriage, your first house,  a family, a great job and more! When you are fifty you are staring down things like retirement (the end of your working days), increased joint pain, your kids moving out (for some this is a good thing, not for, senior citizen discounts, an inevitable ailment and ultimately the big farewell! Damn, I need a drink....

So, as I stare off into the next chapter of my life, unfortunately I don't see as many years ahead of me as I see behind me. That's not being pessimistic (God knows Auntie Mar's the only one in our family breaking the Century mark)...just being a realist! But I hope the good Lord gives me enough time to see the milestones that lie ahead with my Little Man and I get to see him graduate, get married and have kids of his own! If I get there I'll be one happy OLD man!

Now at the ripe, old age of fifty I guess I'll just keep muddling through and pretending that I know what I'm doin' until I finally get found out. But who knows, maybe I won't! Smoke and mirrors folks, smoke and mirrors! Until then I'll keep on lovin' life and thanking God for still being on this side of the ground...healthy and happy! After all, life is what you make it and in the words of Joe Walsh "life's been good to me so far".

Happy 50th to me??? Uh, maybe not :)

Enjoy every sandwich,